I was sitting in a small group when a mom told me that I was selfish for having my daughters fourteen months apart. She continued to say that I should have planned it better so that each child could have experienced quality time with me. It took everything in me to bite my tongue and not go off on her. But when I got home, I burst into tears. I told my husband what this lady had told me. In my sleep, shower and Bible deprived state; her comment had gotten to me. When you are tired and have not spent time in the word of God, it’s easy for people’s comments to become toxic thoughts that run wild in your mind. (lol, I’m not going to go into the shower deprived part.)
As a Mom (or a mentor) you want the best for your children. The more I pray and seek wisdom from God in raising my daughters; He constantly draws me closer to Him. He guides me to resources to help me be a better parent. God casually leads me to truths that help strengthen me. I heard an anecdote of Charles or John Wesley (I can’t remember which brother) wrote about a time in which he was going through a difficult time. He said, “Oh what I would do to have an evening to discuss this matter with my Mom.”
John Wesley is considered to be the father of Methodism. His brother, Charles, composed more than 6,500 hymns. How incredibly proud would you have been to be their Mom, Susanna Wesley?!? Susanna had nineteen children. Nine of them died in infancy. With so many children, she valued the importance of quality time with each one. She would meet with one child for an hour before bed, rotating through her children every night of the week.
When I heard of her story I was very impressed! I started praying many blessings over my children so that they may make a huge positive impact for the Kingdom of God! I wanted to know more about Susanna. While reading her biography I realized that Susanna was like me, flawed. It was refreshing to know that she wasn’t perfect. God uses imperfect people to carry out his agenda. She did not have a lot of resources but did the best with what she was given. She was amazing at homeschooling her children!
I don’t know what I should have told that Mom that was so quick to judge me for having my children closely together. (Don’t ask Joey and I for advice for scheduling pregnancies, lol!) But I know that God orchestrates everything for a purpose (I guess I should have said that!). And even though my girls are close in age, I can follow Susanna’s example and prioritize time with each one! I love that my girls are close in age! Is it hard? YES! But I wouldn’t have it any other way. :)